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happy birthday to my mom

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

i honestly can never remember her age,
without calculating the years. it is my shame.

my mom.
she never fails to scream at me, at the worst of times,
or dig me out from my pits with her words, in the nick of time.
her words, mostly conveying nothing at all,
are just repetitions of questions from last week,
and every other last weeks.
yet that short of variety is her abundance of love.

her endless forgiveness, my countless mistakes.
her door never once shut, however many times i've walked out of it.
i counted on the nicest words she had said,
whenever i performed the nastiest blunders.
she wiped them off the page when i couldnt bring me to,
and reminded me i was doing just fine when i was far from it.
just so i have one excuse less to walk myself to the edge.

this is the first, in 29 years that i am here, and she is there.

posted by peenutkew  # 15:26  0 comments

Saturday, August 15, 2009

some things do not find they ways to the tip, or the top.
they cut holes and slit exits, escaping the queue of time,
committing faults despite there being no regulations nor rules,
not intended for amusement, though.
so how well does one handle pranks?
with a sack of salt? or with a thick tipped and black colored marker?

i fancy the latter, not by choice.
it crosses out and reminds one of the places not to go. again.
it conceals the tampered with cache that cannot be thrashed.

what was that five-letter word i cannot seem to recall the sequence of its spelling,
too easy and with ease. you must be kidding me.
i have given most of mine away and free, 
now just take the rest of what is left too.
i do not need any, anymore.
no, we didnt expect this, and what exactly, i do not really know.

posted by peenutkew  # 14:45  0 comments

keeping it simple

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

+ there are many drivers in manchester who make pedestrians smile, simply by giving way.
+ i have gotten synced with the pace of the country, though i am not very sure if that is a good thing, yet.
+ it is a fortune to grow up in singapore, and unfortunately it only takes one away to realise that.
+ i love talking to my mom over the phone, when i call her but not when she calls me. i think i need to adjust that.
+ i honestly think that my desire to own a blackberry is a luxury, not a necessity.
+ i really hope to be able to ignite those charcoals in that disposable barbecue pit i bought more than 3 months ago, very soon.
+ if you think you know everything about electronics, technology, gadgets and what not, try living here. everything we have in singapore is fed into our mouths with a golden spoon and 2 hands.
+ when i got ripped naked of the things i used to have, it becomes unbelievable and almost surreal to think about how it felt like to have them.
+ it still is scary to imagine failure and an empty hand out of all these at the end of the day, but knowing i have a hand to hold on the other, assures me that it does not mean the end of the road.
+ i am a little confused by the above point after reading it over twice, but am not going to try to rephrase it.
+ it is such joy using my hands to draw, make, cook, build, or simply do something, anything. i think i can easily become a construction worker, window cleaner, carpenter, cook and too many to mention, and feel happy until i retire. (though i am not exceptionally good at any of these, but i guess i do fairly okay in most.)

posted by peenutkew  # 12:58  0 comments

stuck

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

and still.

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almost a full swing back to autumn hanging by one each heavier as it gets but remembering the lightness on top without a grip looser the two reds smudged yellow across leaning against or on seeming alike and even mistaken for one at times but distinctively two and always whole.

it doesnt get easier because it doesnt happen that way, it gets on and there.


posted by peenutkew  # 08:15  0 comments